Well I have just been having some of "those" days lately where I am missing a lot of things from back home. I have been spoiled with visitors, but I know the time is going to come where there won't be any for long periods and I'll just have to get used to that.
The home we are living in is just that "the home". It is not "my home". It usually does not take me long to adapt to new homes, my parents moved around a LOT when I was growing up. This is different - we are still waiting for our furniture to arrive as it's over 3 months late. It's been a real challenge for me trying to live in a place without any of my things, and we don't want to buy too much as we know its' coming...we hope anyways. Also, with having visitors coming and going we feel awful that we dont' have the basics set up for them as of yet.
I don't want to complain too much as I know I have it better than a lot of people. but I am just hitting that point where I miss my freedom. I miss being able to be self-sufficient. I have never had to rely on anyone for anything for as long as I've been an adult. I was very independent and did not mind doing things by myself. Heck, I enjoyed running errands on my own. Now, I am so dependent on my husband as we live in a fairly large city, and I don't feel comfortable enough to drive around by myself yet. I mean I will drive myself to Costco, or to my inlaws, but no more than that.
I'm also missing the ease of things from back home. I kid you not when I say our plumbing goes every other day, and it's always a new issue on top of an old one. The sink leaks, the toilet leaks, the hydro pump breaks, etc... We fix it and a week later they start going again.... WHY? Why can't plumbing just work? Why do I have to take a 2 minute shower everyday in fear that the hydro will go? Oh and our neighbour was stealing our water so I had little to no hot water. I know, shower in the cold - I'm in Cancun, right?
I'm hoping I get over this mood of mine fairly quickly, and I don't blame anyone if you dont' want to read about me getting these things off my chest, but I just need to say some things... Probably a lot more than I have. I don't want to talk to my husband about this too much as I think he is getting sick of me complaining about our furniture, and the house. Not even getting sick of it, but he takes it to heart and I don't want to stress him out. Ahh...life in Mexico... I love it, but why can't things be just a little bit easier? Oh well...in time.
On a plus note - the weather has been amazing, and my best friend is still here for another day.
10 comments:
I have those days too. It's been 5 months and we still don't have our vehicle fixed from an oil change gone bad and going on 2 months past due for the carpenter to finish the dining room furniture and bed frame...I can think of countless examples of having to redo projects and fix things all the time. I ask myself the same question - Why can't things just WORK?! But, things will never live up to expectations that are shaped in a different environment. I find myself letting go of a lot of those expectations here, but it's a gradual process. I also use my blog as a sounding board when I need to blow some steam. :-)
We've had 3 plumbers come to our house because the boiler heats up great, but the water doesn't manage to make it to the shower without a lot of work.
I have to walk 2 blocks to my fiance's house to shower whenever I need to wash my hair.
We're moving in 3 months and I can't wait! I'm hoping the water situation is better.
Are you still waiting on customs for your stuff? Hope it gets here soon!
I know first hand that Mexican plumbing sucks. BUT it is snowing in Calgary right now. Enough said.
girl you know I feel you on the independance thing. And it will come back even if it is very slowly. Im feeling it coming back a little more every month at this point. For sure you should sound off all this stuff in your blog. I feel like you do about not wanting to complain to your husband. Mine still feels a lot of guilt about us having to live here and I hate that. So I keep my gurmping to him at a minimum and usually use my blog or other friends to sound off to.
I understand how frustrated you must feel. Plumbing is a joke here! It seems every week I have to fix a bathroom, a sink, etc. We have been lucky to finally find a great plumber. If you would like his number let me know. Hang in there your stuff will arrive and soon "the home" will feel like your home.
Leah - I think we all have those days, don't we? I know that you are right, I have to let go of my expectations, and shape them to this new life and appreciate what is.
Gringation - That is exactly what is wrong with our boiler!!! The water is there, and then it's GONE!!! Wow, walking everyday eh??!! We have an electricity run house...no gas! It's ridiculous trying to fix things here... no one has the parts!!!!
Yes, we are totally waiting on our shipment and it has NOTHING to do with customs!!! Just the TERRIBLE company we used from Canada.
Acjaime - I heard it was snowing there!!! More to come from what I keep hearing too!!!
Amanda - I guess until we learn to speak Spanish fluently we will lose that little bit of independence we don't have right now, right? Well...that's how I see it for me. You SO get it about the "guilt" part on our husbands. I just don't want to complain too much< but at the same time I want to complain enough that the issues get dealt with - PLUMBING!!!!
Ashlie - Welcome, and thank you! It seems like we have our plumber here every other day!!! We do like him, but it's just this house was not maintained AT ALL and things just keep going wrong, and we have to fix it! I wish there were laws here that held the landlord responsible for taking care of certain things. It's far too lax, and really we are now counting down the months left in our lease!!!
I feel your pain! Living in foreign countries is an adventure with both the good and the bad. It can be really frustrating, but try and cultivate a sense of humor -- it's the best defense!
I forgot, I have a plumbing story for you here. Maybe it will give you a laugh; I know you need one:
http://lifeintheexpatlane.blogspot.com/2009/05/joys-of-expat-housing.html
Girl blog about this as MUCH as you want because I've been going through the same thing and really understand :) I still feel like "Home" is my parents house so far away even though I DO have my things here.
And gosh, I feel like a broken record with my husband and don't want to bring him down so I've stopped complaining as well. It shouldn't be called complaining though, it's just sharing how we feel and people need to do that.
As for learning your way around? I learned by getting my ass lost a few times :D But a much better way would be for you to go out with hubby once in a while and just DRIVE places :) And make sure that YOU'RE the one driving so you'll for reall pay attention. :) You could make a date out of it! Drive somewhere new, learning territory and try out a new restaraunt each time :)
Hope you feel better soon :)
Miss Footloose - welcome, and thanks!! I will have to check out your blog!! You're right, I do need a laugh!!! Humour is the best defense, and usually I do a good job, but too much at once.... You know??!!!
Gringa - Girl miss you long long time!! LOL!!! I SO agree with you about ME needing to drive my ass around town with hubby in the passenger side. He has this wierd thing about me driving his car though, and I don't want a car yet... However, I will explain to him why I need to drive. Heck, I even missed my pilates class two days in a row cuz I didn't know how to get there and back myself!!! This city has grown too fast. I used to have a car here and drive my own ass around!!! OH and we so NEED some alone date nights!!! So that would be GREAT!! You so get it !!!!
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